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- Laughter is not at all a bad beginning for a friendship, and it is far the best ending for one. — Oscar Wilde
- When a father gives to his son, both laugh; when a son gives to his father, both cry. — William Shakespeare
- A laugh, to be joyous, must flow from a joyous heart, for without kindness, there can be no true joy. — Thomas Carlyle
- There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child. — Erma Bombeck
- A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday. — Erma Bombeck
- Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial. — Erma Bombeck