Author · Canadian · b. 1961 · 137 quotes
Forget about being world famous, it's hard enough just getting the automatic doors at the supermarket to acknowledge our existence.
Doug Coupland
Author · Canadian · b. 1961
Being asked what animal you'd like to be is a trick question; you're already an animal.
If you don't change, then what's the point of anything happening to you?
If you don't have a spiritual practice in place when times are good, you can't expect to suddenly develop one during a moment of crisis.
If our subconscious was attractive, we wouldn't have to bury it down deep within us.
Figure out what it is in life you don't do well, and then don't do it.
Flying dreams mean that you're doing the right thing with your life.
Americans are a quarter of a billion people who have almost nothing in common except for the fact they've been told they have lots in common.
Sometimes the best lighting of all is a power failure.
God is what keeps us together after the love is gone.
Every human being you see in the course of a day has a problem that's sucking up at least 70 percent of his or her radar.
Nothing very very good and nothing very very bad ever lasts for very very long.
Salad bars are like a restaurant's lungs. They soak up the impurities and bacteria in the environment, leaving you with much cleaner air to enjoy.
People will always choose more money over more sex.
When Donald Duck traded his wings for arms, was he trading up or trading down?
Once you establish a look, and once everybody recognizes that look as your look, you never have to think about fashion again.
You spend a much larger part of your life being old, not young.
If God drives a car, He'd drive a 1973 Ford LTD Brougham sedan with a claret-colored vinyl roof, with oxblood leather upholstery and an opera window.
Once you see someone lose it, you can never look at them the same way again.
I like doing radio because it's so intimate. The moment people hear your voice, you're inside there heads, not only that, you're in there laying eggs.
Depression is when you have lots of love, but no one's taking.
It's difficult to speak with beautiful people. No matter how hard you try to pretend otherwise, you still want them to like you.
There's a lot to be said for having a small manageable dream.
Blame is just a lazy person's way of making sense of chaos.
Florida isn't so much a place where one goes to reinvent oneself, as it is a place where one goes if one no longer wished to be found.
The future and eternity are two entirely different things.
You can't fake creativity, competence, or sexual arousal.
If cats were double the size they are now, they'd probably be illegal.
Gap clothing allows you to look like you're from nowhere and anywhere.
You can never become rich unless you like rich people.
Christmas makes everything twice as sad.
Making eye contact with adults while dressed as a clown is risky.
Your brain forms roughly 10,000 new cells every day, but unless they hook up to preexisting cells with strong memories, they die. Serves them right.
We need to be around our families not because we have so many shared experiences to talk about, but instead because they know precisely which subjects to avoid.
If you're not a tree hugger, then you're a what, a tree hater?
Thinking you're immortal is weirdly similar to being immortal.
If your life had lyrics, would they be any good?
I think the killers get far too much attention.
Your body isn't just a body. It's an ecosystem.
Big companies are like marching bands. Even if half the band is playing random notes, it still sounds kind of like music. The concealment of failure is built into them.
I have trouble with seafood because it tastes like a dock.
Telling people they look relaxed makes them look relaxed.
Earth was not built for six billion people all running around and being passionate about things. The world was built for about two million people foraging for roots and grubs.
When we constantly ask for miracles, we're unraveling the fabric of the world. A world of continuous miracles would not be a world, it would be a cartoon.
Unhappiness is something we are never taught about; we are taught to expect happiness, but never a Plan B to use to use when the happiness doesn't arrive.
New York is a theme park for people with IQs over 108.
Human beings are the only animal that thinks they change who they are simply by moving to a different place. Birds migrate, but it's not quite the same thing.
If nothing else, we simply get used to being alive.
