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- It's funny how you never think about the women you've had. It's always the ones who get away that you can't forget. — Chuck Palahniuk
- From sixteen to twenty, all women, kept in humor by their hopes and by their attractions, appear to be good-natured. — Samuel Richardson
- Women, as they grow older, rely more and more on cosmetics. Men, as they grow older, rely more and more on a sense of humor. — George Jean Nathan
- When my brother-in-law, BIll Clinton, was elected, he had gay friends. That was a coming out. — Kate Clinton
- Some women can't say the word lesbian... even when their mouth is full of one. — Kate Clinton
- We signed up for Showtime, which I think put us on a Homeland Security list somewhere. — Kate Clinton