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- Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty... mine's putting in an express lane.
- I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
- Anybody could say anything they want about me, and it literally never penetrates my skin.
- I had the right to remain silent... but I didn't have the ability.
- I've got a great cigar collection - it's actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn't going to smoke every last one of 'em.
- I'd rather do a really good small part than a really bad big part.