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- Laughter is not at all a bad beginning for a friendship, and it is far the best ending for one. — Oscar Wilde
- When a father gives to his son, both laugh; when a son gives to his father, both cry. — William Shakespeare
- A laugh, to be joyous, must flow from a joyous heart, for without kindness, there can be no true joy. — Thomas Carlyle
- You might not be able to stomach it, but as long as you can mind it, your heart will be all right. — Brian Celio
- Chuck Norris doesn't need to understand the work of James Joyce; James Joyce needs to understand the work of Chuck Norris. — Brian Celio
- I wonder: when a Jehovah's Witness dies and goes to Heaven, does God hide behind the door and pretend He's not home? — Brian Celio